Kinder-Flix :: “JACK” by Drew Daywalt | ...:::kindertrauma:::...

http://www.kindertrauma.com/?p=12279

Free!

By making a killer bunny robot out of some chicken bones and my own feces, I was able to escape from my captor! So ends another year of Easter Hell! Now I can go back to the usual routine of drunken orgies and sadistic pranks. You know it just isn't funny if it doesn't leave permanent emotional scars!

 

 

I think this might be a good time to check on the army of crack addicted clowns I hired to help me pass out the Easter joy this year. I really don't give a fuck how well they did their

job, but I want to be sure I'm not around when they come looking to get paid. Fucking stupid ass clowns!  

My Easter Nightmare!

I'm posting this from some chick's house while she is out looking for bunny food. I stopped by to do my Easter thing, and the crazy bitch thought I was part of her Easter surprise. Now she has me  trapped and wants to feed me lettuce and shit! If anybody is in Bangpor Alaska and has a bazooka, COME GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!!!!!!

Easter Sucks!

I fucking hate being the fucking Easter Bunny! I've been almost enjoying myself, listening to the screwballs on Fox cry like little bitches because of health care, and now I have to stop what I'm doing and go paint some fucking eggs!

Knowing how much I despise children, you might wonder how I could be for something like health care. It's because the Republicans hate it, that's why! I want to be the one who ruins every one's life! Me! What fun is it to shatter dreams if the Republicans have already beat me to it? I want everyone to be well off and happy so when I suck the joy out of their lives it will fucking mean something!

Check The Bushes!

I'm still laying low after my plan to smuggle pain pills from Mexico in the vaginas of women too nasty to be searched flopped. Seems there are some cops who are willing to wade into anything, no matter how bad it smells.

I would, however like to peek my head out from the undisclosed location where I always hole up when the heat is on, to say goodbye to a guy I knew who just croaked in one of our local hospitals. Kinda makes me almost regret replacing all the plasma with red jello. Sorry, Alex.

Holy fuck! I just found out Davy Crockett dropped too! I can't tell you how much fun I used to have replacing little kid's coonskin hats with real rabid raccoons back in the day! All you had to do was dope the coon up so it would sleep long enough for the kid to put it on, sit back and enjoy the show. It really was a happier time.

Inglourious Basterds

Rating:	★★★★★
Category:	Movies
Genre:	Romantic Comedy

I hate to like anything, but I gotta say THIS SHIT WAS WORTH THE RISK I TOOK STEALING IT FROM WALMART! Don't wait! Steal your copy today!

Internet Gangsterism!

Be on the lookout for a new version of an old scam. You get a warning saying you got some fucked up virus shit on your PC. It all looks like an official Windows message. You click on the shit and it downloads an anti-virus program THAT PROCEEDS TO FUCK UP YOUR COMPUTER UNTIL YOU PAY THEM FIFTY BUCKS TO DOWNLOAD THE FULL VERSION! It's a fucking protection racket in digital form!

Not a bad idea, but not as fun as the virus that turns your cursor into a cartoon dick.