Tuesday, September 29, 2009


First you got a 30 year old crime that was committed by a guy who has led a nice quiet, peaceful life since then, making movies that a lot of people dig. Add in that the guy's parents were killed by Nazis and that his wife and unborn child were hacked up by psychos. Then, just to seal the deal, toss in the fact that the victim has stated she isn't too concerned about all of this shit, and have the president of France stand up for the guy in a big way. Know what you got? A FUCKING WASTE OF THE TAX PAYER'S MONEY!!! Why the fuck would we spend a dime to extradite this guy from across the fucking world now? Next thing you know Jesus is going to pop up as a witness for the defense. And even if he was convicted, the guy is fucking 70. By this point we would just be putting him in jail so we could pay for his fucking medical care while he died.

Here's an idea. Why not take all the money and resources and use it to bust some mother fuckers who are out raping kids right now? Stupid fucks.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Big Deal!

Everybody is tripping because Iran has the bomb. Who the fuck cares? As long as we have bigger bombs what the fuck are they gonna do? Maybe they can take out a city or two, but we got too many fucking cities anyway. Erase a few of the ones we don't need, like Cleveland or something, and nobody will even notice. And as a bonus, it will give us an excuse to show how bad-ass we are by turning their whole fucking country into a radioactive crater full of screaming skinless mutants begging for death. Try fucking your 72 virgins with a melted dick, Ackmed!

Unless they want to eat a flaming ball of not quite instant death, they will keep their shit in the silo and shut the fuck up.

Monday, September 14, 2009

More Pissed Off Than Usual!

Sometimes I listen to Rush and the rest of the clowns on Fox just so I can work myself up into a homicidal rage. Fuck, it beats being bored. Listening to Rush is like sitting in on a Nazi Youth rally. The guy repeats the idea he wants to get across over and over again, like a guy who wants people to join him in his compound to wait for the aliens to show up. This ain't a guy passing along information. This is indoctrination. This is propaganda. The other day I listened to him repeat about twenty times "The Democrats caused the recession." Never mind that Bush had a Republican majority in Congress, and the Democrats were in no position to do shit (kinda like the Republicans now). If he says it enough he figures people will come to believe Obama is responsible for the shitty economy, even though it was already in the crapper before the guy was even  on the playing field. And he's right. People fall for that shit. They forget all about paying five fucking dollars a gallon for gas and going to their favorite burger joint only to find it closed. They forget who was in office when they lost their shitty ass jobs.

Too bad for all of these caveman ass mother fuckers. They can be pissed all they fucking want,

but their day is fucking over. Unless the Democrats go ape shit like they did in the 60s and 70s and turn things over to the freaks, the cavemen have lost. Sorry, Flintstone social Darwinism is dead. The only Darwin you'll be getting is when we teach your kids all about that nasty evolution thing you never understood.

Finding a Used Mannequin


Why Won't God Heal Amputees?


People of Walmart


Saturday, September 12, 2009


Some times this immortal Easter Bunny gig sucks. After being around for a few thousand years there ain't much left to do. How many chicks can you screw with a plunger while riding a motorcycle backwards at 90 miles an hour through a school zone and still have it be fun?

So, I'm taking a poll. This week end I should... 

1) go on a murder spree that some how involves all of these garden gnomes I've stolen over the years

2) do something nasty to a priest

3) break into random cars and plant things like spank mags, used condoms and roaches

4) drop live kittens off the overpass onto unsuspecting motorists

5) yell "Fire!" in a crowded theater everyday for a week, and then on Saturday really set the place on fire

and see if anyone pays attention

6) do my ventriloquist act at some local funerals

"Let me out!"

7) take it easy, drink a few beers and work on my

sex slave collection

8) go to some body's wedding, nail my cock to a board and hang myself from a tree outside of the church

Friday, September 11, 2009

Remastered Beatles

Genre: Rock
Artist:The Beatles
This shit sounds fucking great! You can even hear Ringo's drums for a change. I don't know if the casual Beatle fan will notice the difference, but those extra sounds just jumped out and made love to my bunny ears.
It's a fucking shame nothing has come along in the 40 years since the Beatles broke up that people will still want to listen to 40 years from now like they listen to this stuff.